HeadLines Of The Year Part-1

Miners Refuse to Work after Death

[those good-for-nothin' lazy bastards!]



Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant

[see if that works any better than a fair trial!]



War Dims Hope for Peace

[I can see where it might have that effect!]


If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last Awhile

[you think?!]



Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures

[who would have thought!]



Enfield (London) Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide

[they may be on to something!]



Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges

[you mean there's something stronger than duct tape?!]



Man Struck By Lightning Faces Battery Charge

[he probably IS the battery charge!]



New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group

[weren't they fat enough?!]



Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft

[That's what he gets for eating those beans!]